First came the roofer.
“Your insulation is only 20 centimetres thick,”
he said.
“Kyoto Protocol requires 40;
I can fix it
so your house will be cool in the summer,
warm in the winter.”
Then came the window specialist.
“These are not according to code,” he said,
“They transfer heat from around the frame
and through the glass.
Our new models are tightly sealed
and Argon-insulated;
they will keep your house cool in the summer,
warm in the winter.”
Duct cleaning service was next.
“Clogged with dirt,”
announced the rep,
his tone conveys the gravity of the situation.
“They have to be cleaned
if you want your house to be cool in the summer,
warm in the winter.”
The air-conditioning guy was sweating working on the compressor.
“It’s not worth the repair”, he said,
pointing at the rusty part.
“I could get you a deal
on a brand new central air;
it will really keep your house
cool in the summer.”
The heating technician didn’t waste time.
“It’s only 65 percent efficiency,” he said,
his flashlight’s beam probes the old furnace.
“They don’t make these anymore.
I could send a salesperson
to explain our high-efficiency model;
it will really keep you
warm in the winter.”
Considering a new iron-free, short sleeve shirt
at the sport outfit store.
Associate says
it is made from a hi-tech thread
that transfers moisture
away from the body.
I wonder if it will keep me
cool in the summer.
By Shai Ben-Shalom
