The Department of Transport is studying labour shortages in maritime shipping after a union caught regulators licensing migrant workers in breach of federal law. The case was settled out of court last December 16: “This has been coming for a long time.”
End Of An Era In Cookery
A federal panel has struck the Bake-Off cooking contest off Canada’s trademark registry for “inactivity”. The Pillsbury Company ran the famed one-day competition for sixty-five years: ‘It is clearing the register of dead wood.’
More Allegations At Senate
A Senate committee chair yesterday disclosed multiple complaints of harassment are pending under a new zero tolerance policy against workplace bullying. No senators were named: “I’m afraid that’s confidential.”
“Oh”: CBC Tries New Motto
The CBC in a bid at rebranding has trademarked the word “Oh”. Network lawyers filed the claim with the Department of Industry as a Conservative Party leadership candidate called for privatization of the English TV service: “Radio-Canada Oh-dio.”
Green Tech Depends On Aid
Green tech firms are nearly three times more likely to rely on taxpayer subsidies than most small and medium-sized businesses, says a federal report. Department of Industry researchers noted other small companies “report difficulties in accessing financing”.
Milk Pact A ‘Bad Precedent’
Cabinet’s latest free trade deal sets a “very dangerous precedent” for all Canadian exporters, farmers yesterday told the Commons agriculture committee. The continental trade pact limits exports of Canadian dairy products to countries worldwide: “This is a first.”
Won’t Reveal Phone Seizures
The Canada Border Services Agency will not disclose how many private cellphones and iPads it has seized from travelers. The Agency acknowledged it searches tens of thousands of devices a year under an obscure provision of the Customs Act: “Canadian law is quite permissive.”
“Is It $20 Billion? Is It 25?…”
Cabinet will not disclose how much it’s prepared to spend on the taxpayer-owned Trans Mountain Pipeline. Finance Minister Bill Morneau yesterday declined comment under repeated questioning at the Commons finance committee: “$17 billion and counting.”
Promise No Carbon Tax Hike
Cabinet’s leader in the Senate yesterday said the Prime Minister will not raise the carbon tax. Assurances from Senator Marc Gold (Que.) contradicted Access To Information records indicating cabinet would “confirm future price increases” after 2022: “Canadians want to know.”
5,800,000 Bank Complaints
A federal agency in first-ever national research yesterday confirmed banks are indifferent to customer complaints, and make resolution of serious errors needlessly complicated. Banks receive 5.8 million complaints a year, said the Financial Consumer Agency: “Banks do not make it easy.”
Cheats ‘Socially Acceptable’
The popularity of tax cheating remains “challenging”, says an internal Canada Revenue Agency audit. The Agency said six years after it launched a national crackdown on the underground economy, tax avoidance remains socially acceptable: ‘It is more challenging than initially anticipated.’
Little Interest In Equity Loans
Homebuyers show little interest in new federal equity loans, mortgage brokers said yesterday. Brokers said the new program is so restrictive it serves no purpose for most first-time buyers: “We do not expect to see much of a change.”
Weed-Killer Lawsuit Nixed
A federal judge has dismissed an environmental lawsuit against a bestselling weed-killer, glyphosate. The product sold under the brand name Roundup has been used by Canadian farmers, gardeners and landscapers since 1976: ‘Scientifically founded doubt cannot be based on a newspaper article.’
Big Pig Crashes PCO Banquet
The Privy Council Office last night defended the expense of a VIP cocktail party at the National Arts Centre to present engraved prizes to federal media managers. Guests faced a lone demonstrator, Porky the Waste Hater, pig mascot of the Canadian Taxpayers Federation: “We bring out the pig when we think money is being wasted.”
MPs Speed Trade Hearings
The Commons trade committee yesterday voted to speed hearings on a continental free trade pact. Opposition MPs noted cabinet has yet to disclose data on the economic impact of the United States-Mexico-Canada Agreement: “What are you hiding?”



