Sunday Poem: “Elections”

 

Andrew Scheer

faces a delicate task:

scoop up the admirers

of Stephen Harper, Doug Ford,

Kellie Leitch and Maxime Bernier

while insisting

he is nothing like Harper, Ford,

Leitch or Bernier.

 

Justin Trudeau’s task

is rather simple:

tell voters

he is nothing like the Justin

they have seen thus far.

 

(Editor’s note: poet Shai Ben-Shalom, an Israeli-born biologist, examines current events in the Blacklock’s tradition each and every Sunday)

23¢ Carbon Tax More Like It

Cabinet yesterday said it will never raise the 12¢-a litre carbon tax on gasoline though the Parliamentary Budget Office warned at least 23¢ is needed to meet emission targets. Environment Minister Catherine McKenna did not explain how targets will be met: “The price will not go up.”

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First Senate Audit In Years

The Senate budget committee yesterday endorsed an independent audit of its $114 million administration for the first time since 2012. It follows disclosures Senate managers broke contracting rules in spending $95,000 for doormen and ushers: “Troubles begin.”

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Feds Shrug Off Audit Cuts

The Department of Finance yesterday rejected additional funding for the Office of the Auditor General despite a cut of nearly fifty percent in the number of yearly audits. “They weren’t stonewalled,” said Assistant Deputy Finance Minister Nicholas Leswick: “They didn’t receive nothing.”

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Farm Lobby Loses Fish Act

Cabinet yesterday rejected a key Senate amendment to the Fisheries Act sought by farm lobbyists, and cut short debate to speed the bill into law. “We are planning to get things done,” said Fisheries Minister Jonathan Wilkinson.

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Need More Animal Bills: AG

A bill to curb dogfighting for sport yesterday was endorsed by the Senate social affairs committee. Attorney General David Lametti said the bill “does not go far enough” and should prompt other animal protections: “There is much more work to be done.”

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Challenge CRTC At Cabinet

Cabinet faces a rare petition to overturn a CRTC decision dubbed a $20 million subsidy for Rogers Media Inc. “The Commission caved,” said a rival applicant for a lucrative license to broadcast multilingual news programming nationwide: “Any other decision would have been better.”

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Disclose Data On Bad Airlines

Transport Canada yesterday said it will begin monthly monitoring of major airlines for poor service including late flights and lost luggage. Data will be published online for consumers’ benefit, officials said: “Weak results would almost certainly spur efforts to improve.”

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Safety Rule Took Four Years

Inter-provincial trucking and commercial bus fleets yesterday were ordered to install electronic engine monitors for public safety. The reform comes four years after the Commons transport committee recommended Canada abolish drivers’ paper logbooks: “Pay attention to the road.”

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$2M Windfall For The Globe

The Department of Public Works awarded the Globe & Mail an untendered contract for news clippings worth $2 million, more than double a previous Globe contract. An independent publisher and former Liberal cabinet minister yesterday described lucrative election-year fees to corporate media as ridiculous. “What’s in the Kool-Aid?”

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CRA Deletes A Million Pages

The Canada Revenue Agency has erased a million pages of charity filings from its website, the Commons finance committee was told yesterday. The Agency said the deletion was unrelated to claims of suspected fraud by shell charities: “I totally expect you to believe that.”

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MPs Reject School Bus Belts

The Commons transport committee yesterday rejected any federal regulation mandating seatbelts on school buses. Transport Canada calculated a seatbelt requirement would cost school boards $20,000 per vehicle refit, the equivalent of $400 million nationwide: “The issue of retrofitting school buses is very complex.”

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